There is so much talk about whether or not the person you're dating or involved with should be concerned about your ex...
This topic has many opinions surrounding it because there's always the question/statement of............ "Shouldn't you leave the past...in the past?"
While I agree with this...I am also sceptical because NOT all exes are BAD! Some come into your life for a reason at one point in time and space....maybe to make you realize something or get you closer to God, family or friends....but if they come back into your life maybe the second (third, fourth, fifth...lol) time...it might be the right time, being that both of you are (hopefully) on the same level and totalling committing yourselves to one another.
But then on the flip side there are Exes who ARE BAD (for you)...y’all ended terrible, you fight a lot and could never see yourselves with that person everrrr again...
This could be a good idea when saying you should definitely leave the past in the past because the two of you are clearly not for each other...one would think...
However, there are situations that occur when exes (who've done good or bad to each other) get back together...and live their lives like nothing ever happened.
Of course they've shared great times together and will continue to carry good and bad memories...especially if they been together for awhile or just broke up....
So my question is do you think is acceptable for the new person coming into the relationship to be jealous or concerned about the ex?
In my opinion I think it all depends on their situation for example if they ended on a bad note but he or she’s ex still wants them or if you know in your heart that you're just the rebound person you have a right to be concerned...also when getting to know your partner there’s the period where most will talk about their past relationships the things they liked and didn’t like...and it would be kind of fishy if you share your past with them but they (the person with the recent exe factor) won’t share theirs with you...this could too stir up some concern...
BUT (there’s always a but) if he or she isn't giving you anything to go on, trust them, let it go and be happy! Don’t go around looking for trouble and assume because you might just find it and be right.
I realize it is hard getting over an ex whether it is because of their smile, personality, the time you’ve spent/wasted with them or their great sex...some do still have a huge effect of you especially if you still love and care about them...I understand it could take a long time to get over the person you were once in love or lust with! But remember if you’re not over them, it’s OKAY to be single...don’t rush into something with someone else because you may hurt them in the long run or short run...and that isn’t very nice!
So what do you think? Do you agree with me...or not? Should you leave the past...in the past?
I must share with you...one of my favs by Lauren Hill
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I agree with you in the sense that it depends on the situation. I also think it depends on whether it is relevant. If you have a baby with your ex, then yes you should tell me. If you still work with or its required that you spend a lot of time with your ex, then again yes I should know. Basically I think the past only needs to be brought into the present when and if it will have an effect on our relationship presently and in the future!
ReplyDeleteAnd I agreed with you !!! Those are both good facts...
ReplyDeletei agree too with you nera.. sometimes the past is most def necessary to be brought into the present especially if you do not know much about the person to begin with and you are gettin to know each other. i think that talked about past relationships is important so that you can get a sense of what that person is like in a relationship and just some back up info.. but don't make judgments on the past unless you feel it is valid.. and go with the flow remembering to always protect your heart above everything and yeah do what makes you happy as long as you are on the same page !
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